Journal Entry For Tuesday December 10 2024
Day 10 Journal Entry
Date: Tuesday December 10, 2024
Focus: Patience, Consistency, and Building Our Future
Today marks Day 10 of my plan, and I feel both hopeful and reflective. Each day is a step forward, and while I know progress isn’t always linear, I’m committed to staying the course. My goal is clear: reunifying with Janis and the kids and creating a stable, loving home. I want to prove that my growth is real, lasting, and rooted in love and responsibility.
I’ve been thinking deeply about how important it is to balance patience with action. I know I can’t force Janis to make a decision, but I can continue to demonstrate through my words and actions that I am here for the long haul. This morning’s counseling session reminded me that growth is an ongoing process. Each session, each prayer, and each moment of reflection strengthens my resolve.
Thoughts on Moving Forward
I genuinely believe that moving in around Christmas could be a turning point for our family. Not just for financial or logistical reasons, but because it represents a fresh start—a chance to enter the new year as a united front. We’ve already been spending nights together peacefully, and the kids thrive when we’re both there. It feels natural, and I hope Janis can see that too.
I understand Janis’s hesitation. After everything we’ve been through, trust isn’t easily rebuilt. But I want her to know that the changes I’ve made since August aren’t temporary. I’m grounded in my sobriety, my therapy, and my faith. I’ve learned to manage my emotions, recognize my triggers, and respond with understanding rather than reaction. I know that consistency over time will be the proof she needs.
The Purpose Driven Life / The Love Dare
- Purpose Driven Life:
In “The Purpose Driven Life” day 7, titled “The Reason for Everything,” the central message is that the ultimate purpose of life is to bring glory to God, as everything in existence, including humans, was created for His glory; essentially, the reason for everything is to showcase God’s greatness and goodness.
Key points from Day 7:
- God’s Glory:
The primary focus is on understanding what “God’s glory” means – it represents His essence, power, and splendor. - Created for Purpose:
Humans were created specifically to bring glory to God through their actions and lives. - Living for God:
The choice to live for oneself or for God is presented, with the emphasis on choosing to live a life dedicated to God’s purpose.
- The Love Dare:
On Day 2 of “The Love Dare,” the challenge is to perform at least one unexpected act of kindness for your spouse as a gesture of love; essentially, to surprise them with a thoughtful action that shows you care, going beyond your usual routine to demonstrate appreciation and affection.
Key points about Day 2:
- Focus on the unexpected: The goal is to do something your partner wouldn’t normally expect, making the gesture feel more special.
- Be thoughtful: Consider what your spouse truly enjoys or needs, and tailor your act of kindness accordingly.
- Small gestures can have a big impact: Even a simple act of service can convey a significant message of love.
- Example acts of kindness for Day 2:
Making their favorite meal, Doing a chore they usually handle, Writing a heartfelt note, Bringing them a small gift for no reason, and Giving them a relaxing massage.
I am choosing to Clean the Inside of Janis’s car while I have it before she picks it up when she gets off work and before I go to my job interview at 1pm.
How I Showed Growth Today
- Empathy and Patience:
- In my messages to Janis, I focused on being supportive, giving her space, and expressing my hope without pressure. I want her to feel safe in considering our future together.
- Commitment to Mental Health:
- I attended my counseling session this morning and stayed proactive about my PTSD treatment. Taking care of my mental health is a responsibility I take seriously.
- Communication with CPS:
- I sent an email to Ronna Wheaton to clarify what services are needed and how I can ensure we’re on track. Staying compliant is a priority, and I want to show that I am fully committed to the process.
Three Ways to Support Janis and the Kids
- Offer Emotional Reassurance:
- Remind Janis that my commitment to her and the children is unwavering. I will continue to show up, listen, and be present without rushing or pushing too hard.
- Create a Positive Vision:
- Share thoughts about what our life could look like if we move in together for Christmas—peaceful mornings, shared responsibilities, and the joy of starting the new year as a family.
- Stay Consistent:
- My actions must continue to align with my words. Whether through messages, visits, or daily responsibilities, I will demonstrate reliability and patience.
Affirmations for Today
- “I am patient, loving, and consistent. My actions speak louder than my words.”
- “I trust that time and consistency will rebuild trust with Janis.”
- “I am creating a future filled with love, stability, and hope.”
Closing Reflection
I know that reunification isn’t something that happens overnight. But each step I take brings me closer to that goal. I am grateful for the opportunity to grow, to learn, and to love more deeply. I will keep moving forward with faith, patience, and a heart full of love for Janis and the kids. No matter how long it takes, I am committed to making this work.
Day 11 Journal Entry
Date: 11 December 2024 Wednesday
Focus: Building Trust Through Love and Forgiveness
Today, I feel a renewed sense of hope and determination. The kids’ letters to Janis are a beautiful reminder that love and forgiveness are at the heart of everything we’re working toward. Their innocence, honesty, and desire for us to be together give me strength.
I know Janis is hesitant, and I understand why. Trust was broken, and rebuilding it takes time. But I also know that forgiveness is a bridge we can walk together. Just as I’ve forgiven her, I pray she can forgive me. We’ve both made mistakes, but our love and commitment can guide us forward.
I believe moving in around Christmas is more than a practical choice—it’s an emotional and symbolic step toward healing. A fresh start before the new year, under one roof, gives us a chance to create a stable, loving home for our children.
I will continue to show patience, consistency, and love. My actions will speak louder than words. I’m committed to this journey, no matter how long it takes, because my family means everything to me.
Closing Affirmation
“I am patient, loving, and committed. Each day, I move closer to the life we all deserve.”
Afternoon Journalling
- Reflective Journaling:
- Write about:
- What does a fresh start with Janis and the kids look like to me?
- How can I continue to show Janis that my growth is lasting?
- Write about:
Date: Wednesday December 11, 2024
Focus: Reflective Journaling
Reflective Journal Entry 1
Topic: What a Fresh Start with Janis and the Kids Looks Like to Me
Date: Wednesday December 11, 2024
When I think about a fresh start with Janis and the kids, I imagine a life built on love, trust, and stability—a home where each of us feels safe, cherished, and understood. A fresh start doesn’t mean forgetting the past; it means learning from it and choosing to move forward with open hearts and renewed commitment.
In my mind, a fresh start looks like:
- Peaceful Mornings: Waking up together, starting the day with calm and intention. We’re all in the same home, sharing breakfast, talking about the plans for the day, and supporting each other before heading out. There’s a sense of routine and normalcy that brings comfort to the kids.
- Healthy Communication: Janis and I listening to each other fully, without judgment. We’re honest, transparent, and respectful of each other’s feelings. When challenges arise, we handle them together with patience, rather than reacting out of fear or frustration.
- Family Bonding Time: Evenings spent doing simple activities—playing games, watching movies, cooking together. We create memories that the kids will carry with them forever. They see their parents united, cooperating, and enjoying each other’s company. Our home is filled with laughter and warmth.
- Stability for the Kids: Knowing they have both their parents present gives the kids a sense of security. They return to Merkel ISD feeling confident and supported. They know that no matter what happens, they are loved and that their family is strong and committed to each other.
- A Safe and Loving Environment: Our home becomes a place where we all feel emotionally and physically safe. It’s a place where mistakes are met with understanding, where growth is celebrated, and where love guides our actions.
- Faith as Our Foundation: We grow together spiritually, attending church and relying on faith to guide our decisions. We pray together, seek wisdom together, and build a family life rooted in Christian values of love, forgiveness, and grace.
A fresh start isn’t just a new chapter—it’s a chance to rewrite our story together. I believe in this vision, and I am committed to making it a reality through patience, love, and consistent action.
Reflective Journal Entry 2
Topic: How Can I Continue to Show Janis That My Growth Is Lasting?
Date: Wednesday December 11, 2024
I know that words alone aren’t enough to prove that I’ve changed. Trust is built through actions—consistent, reliable, and loving actions that show Janis that my growth is genuine and lasting. Here are the ways I can continue to demonstrate this growth every day:
- Consistency Over Time:
- I need to keep showing up, day after day, with the same commitment and patience. Whether it’s through daily communication, attending therapy, or following through on promises, my actions must remain steady. Growth isn’t a one-time event; it’s a continuous process.
- Emotional Regulation:
- When difficult situations arise, I will continue to manage my emotions thoughtfully. Instead of reacting out of anger, jealousy, or insecurity, I will pause, reflect, and respond calmly. This shows Janis that I’ve developed the skills to handle challenges in a healthy way.
- Transparency and Honesty:
- Being open about my thoughts, feelings, and progress is crucial. I will communicate openly with Janis, share my reflections, and listen to her without defensiveness. Transparency builds trust, and I want her to know that I have nothing to hide.
- Support and Empathy:
- I will prioritize Janis’s feelings and needs, showing her that I genuinely care about her well-being. Whether she needs space, support, or simply someone to listen, I will be there for her without pressure. Empathy means understanding her perspective and validating her experiences.
- Continued Personal Growth:
- I will stay committed to my therapy, faith, and sobriety. Attending sessions with my psychologist, maintaining my recovery, and leaning on my faith are non-negotiable parts of my life now. I will document this progress and share it when appropriate.
- Parenting Together:
- Supporting Janis in parenting decisions and working as a team with the kids shows that I’m committed to being a responsible, loving father. The kids need to see their parents united and working toward their best interests.
- Respecting Boundaries:
- I understand that rebuilding trust takes time, and I will honor Janis’s boundaries. Giving her space when she needs it and being patient will show her that I respect her healing process.
- Actions Matching Words:
- Every promise I make must be followed by action. Whether it’s a small task or a big commitment, I will ensure that what I say aligns with what I do. Reliability is the foundation of trust.
- Expressing Gratitude and Love:
- Regularly acknowledging Janis’s strengths, expressing appreciation, and showing love in thoughtful ways will reinforce how much I cherish her. Small gestures—notes, kind words, or acts of service—can remind her of my devotion.
I know that lasting growth is a journey, not a destination. I am committed to walking this path with integrity, love, and patience. Each day is an opportunity to show Janis that I am the partner and father she can rely on.
Closing Thoughts
I believe in the future we can build together. Through consistent action, emotional maturity, and unwavering love, I will continue to show Janis that my growth is real. My hope is that, over time, she will feel safe enough to trust in this journey and in the love we share.
Daily Journal Entry
Topic: What a Fresh Start Looks Like and How I Show Lasting Growth
Today, I’ve been focusing on what a fresh start with Janis and the kids truly means. It’s more than just living under one roof; it’s about creating an environment filled with love, trust, and stability. I envision us starting the new year together—waking up on Christmas morning as a family, sharing moments of joy and hope. The kids deserve to see us united, cooperating, and building a future together.
To show Janis that my growth is lasting, I need to stay consistent. Each day, I prove through my actions that I am reliable and patient. Completing the drug test today is another step in showing that my commitment to sobriety is unwavering. Preparing for my job interview reflects my dedication to providing financial stability.
I know Janis has fears and hesitations, and I want to support her through them. By focusing on love, empathy, and consistent actions, I hope to ease her worries and help her see that a fresh start before Christmas isn’t just possible—it’s the right step for all of us.
I am grateful for the progress we’ve made and the hope that continues to grow. I will remain patient, steady, and full of love, trusting that this journey will lead us to the family life we all desire.
Closing Affirmation
“I am patient, loving, and committed. My actions reflect my growth, and I trust that each step forward brings us closer to a fresh start.”
Daily Journal Entry
Topic: How a Christmas Together Can Be the Start of Our New Journey
Date: 14 December, 2024 Saturday
Today, I’ve been reflecting on what it would mean for Janis and me to start fresh by moving in together before Christmas. It’s more than just a date on the calendar—it’s a chance to give our family the gift of unity, hope, and healing.
I imagine waking up on Christmas morning with the kids, sharing the warmth of being together under one roof. The joy in their eyes as they see their parents united would be a moment we could all cherish. This new beginning could be a symbol of the forgiveness, growth, and love we’ve worked so hard to rebuild.
To show Janis that my growth is real and lasting, I need to stay patient, consistent, and loving. My actions—whether it’s through daily communication, completing the CPS requirements, or showing up for the kids—prove that I am committed to this path. I understand her hesitation, but I believe our love and the progress we’ve made are strong enough to take this step.
I’m grateful for each opportunity to show Janis that I’ve changed. My heart is open, my intentions are clear, and my hope is steadfast. I will continue to walk this journey with love, faith, and patience, trusting that our family can heal and thrive.